Six things mentors should avoid

When properly managed, mentoring brings benefits to both parties involved. Sometimes, though, for all the mentor’s good intentions, things may go awry. If you yourself are a mentor, bear in mind the following mistakes the best mentors will always avoid.

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This list was offered by fastcompany.com.

1. Making assumptions

It is wrong to suppose from an early stage that the protégé’s problems may be solved by implanting your own solutions. First you need to look at the situation in more depth. Allow the protégé to talk and even suggest solutions before offering advice yourself.

2. Going off track

It is important to know where the mentor-protégé relationship should lead. That does not mean dogmatically following a prescribed route at all costs, but the end-goal should be clear enough, as well as at least a general idea of how you might get there.

3. Falling short

Some protégés may be in awe of their more experienced mentors and therefore reluctant to bother them with requests for help. It will help put protégés at ease if you yourself contact them on a regular basis – every few months, say – to ask about the current state of play.

4. Becoming overbearing

By all means mention your own experience, supported by anecdotes, but don’t cross the line whereby the dialogue becomes all about you. Focus more on asking questions. Remember also that protégés sometimes have more than one mentor and may not be impressed by personal boasting on your part.

5. Ducking awkward topics

Occasionally you have to be cruel to be kind. You won’t help your protégé by ignoring their shortcomings. Issues of race and gender may complicate the feedback process; it is best to establish some ground rules in advance. If, however, time shows that either party is having problems with the relationship, it may be wise simply to move on.

6. Fighting change

The whole point of the process is to help the protégé develop, so you should be happy to see this happen. If in the course of time the mentor-protégé status starts to resemble more a relationship of two peers, this is a sign that you as the mentor have done your job well.

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